Saturday, February 25, 2012

The Helen Mirren Makeover that Will Never Happen

Courtesy of KPA photoshop

Helen Mirren is out in public again looking like one of those old women who over-dress, often in exaggerated feminine clothes and gaudy colors, which make them look like much younger women (and often like girls).

I recently wrote about Mirren:
Why cannot I be as young (and attractive) as any fifteen-year-old, at my ripe old age of seventy? Such are the mantra of the equal-opportunity narcissists.
I tried to "mature" Mirren by doing simple photoshop on her appearance, which was mostly to:

- narrow the skirt

- change the gaudy, mismatching colors, and give her a black sweater to subdue the very bright red satin dress

- add a belt to the dress

- narrow the dress from the flair to a more sophisticated straight cut

- change her handbag to black (I wonder what she could have in that mini-suitcase at a glamorous event?)

- give her black shoes (again, I wonder at this choice of clunky sandals)

- give her the necklace that the woman next to her is wearing, although I've narrowed it a little

- get rid of the dangling earrings

I couldn't change her hairstyle, but I think it looks fine with her new look.

What Mirren ends up doing is rejecting beauty, as I wrote here on another outfit of hers:
Mirren looks like those Madames in Western brothels. I don't think that is her intention, though. The underlying problem, as with all liberals, is that she's simply not in touch with beauty and its standards, and can be lured into wearing whatever contemporary stylists, who themselves are hostile towards beauty, pull out for her.
Mirren should hire me as her stylist, rather than whichever "expert" is whispering in her ear.